In time with a brimful of Ashas!
Sushi & Champagne Lockdown Birthday Lunch
Halfway to 90
I’ve just had my 45th birthday, I am now officially half way to 90, and I have to admit that feels way closer than 0. Life has sped up as I age, is this the same for you to? Or perhaps just the fall out from our 24/7 instant societies?
I’ve Got the Whole World in my Hands – aaaaaaarrrggg
I am certainly missing some of my departed elders, regularly noticing the lack of protection between myself and responsibility. They made me feel safe, the world was in their capable hands, now it’s in mine, and although I know I can generally handle that, sometimes I just want to be small again.
Given that I didn’t enjoy being small, chaffing at the bit to be an independent adult, that’s rather peculiar and perhaps slightly whiffs of “the grass is always greener”!
Not in the Mood to Partay
I didn’t want a big gathering this year, despite that fact that doors to the leisure industry flew open upon my birthday – the 4th July. I couldn’t imagine anything worse that suddenly being surrounded by lots of drunken, rowdy people.
Actually I just didn’t want to share these ;-p
Desirable Distancing
Lockdown for me has seen me become quite anti-social, it appears that enforced distancing has led to desired distancing. I am not sure whether this is a long term consequence or just the backlash of 24 hr exposure to the needs of my immediate family, including our 2 cats, of which one has multiplied x4. The extreme lack of personal space has jammed my frequencies and taken up all my head room. Or, the worst possible scenario, I am turning into my husband!!!
Communication Overwhelm
I have for sometime, and previously written about, felt overwhelmed by the vast array of communication channels available in today’s world. Feeling the entirely self imposed, subtle and relentless pressure for immediate response. Being an empath, I naturally want to caretake other’s feelings, but also recognise that if I don’t do it then and there, I will simply forget evermore.
Unfortunately, if I get gatecrashed simultaneously, I more easily overlook and don’t respond. I think I am actually rather shit at multitasking.
Conscious Coupling
It’s not like lockdown has meant online social interaction has massively lessened, more that in amongst the crazy busyness, there has been space to notice how I am feeling about initiating it. This situation has also been a line in the sand affair, in the main I’ve consciously chosen to couple with people whom share similar views upon this crisis.
Spiritual Contexting
And in all the media hyped up fear, it’s to my spiritual self that I’ve turned and focused upon. Rescuing my sanity and allowing me the chance to reaffirm my connection to Mother N. It’s a hell of a lot more comfortable and peaceful to believe there is a point to everything and life’s not just a giant random cluster fuck.
Nothing to Spare
I don’t have the energy to spare spending deflecting anyone else’s fear, trying to comfort them or help them to rationalise what the fuck is going on. Any energy, that I am not using on maintaining my family, is being directed towards the greater intention to keep drawing us towards the light side.
Mass Bullshit
For towards the light we must go, keeping our focus to make sure we do not live a carbon dominated future. And, not to be side railed by these misguided into to believing, by politicians and greedy corporates, we need all this material shite to survive. Or, that safety only exists in the shape of a frickin world-wide vaccine?!
We’re Individuals
Errrr takes over 15 years to develop a vaccine that is largely safe, and still and again, one size does not fit all and some people die. And, my biggest mahoosive, ginormous, bug bare about contemporary western medicine, it treats us as one, not individuals. Yet each of us is entirely biologically unique, so we need a tailored approach to our personal health. I’ve had to solve 90% of my own health problems myself!
It’s Not Over
I am not sure where we’re going next, will it be another outbreak, is that all just tactical bollocks designed to further pave the way for justifying this vaccination. I do know this it’s not over, far from it, things will and need to get a hell of a lot worse before they can improve. Perhaps thats why I am remaining low key and distanced, I don’t want to come out to have to go back in again.
I certainly prefer the roads quieter, the sky free from airplanes, people out and about on foot, bike or horse.
Freak-out Opportunity
If, what I’ve written is freaking you out and you wish to connect with your spiritual self but don’t know how. Take a workshop with me and I’ll teach you how.x
